Live With No Regrets ♥

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♥ Live With No Regrets .

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ANGELA LAI
the happy girl who lives with no regrets.

She likes to busk in the limelight,
and enjoys capturing attention.
I do not live in the shadow of others
and i HATE to be forgotten.

I do what i say,
And, i say what i feel.

You think you know me?
Think TWICE before u judge.

Here, i do my constant ranting.
Here, i update my camwhoring photos.
Everything here are purely MY opinions,
and u don't have to agree with me.
If my narcissism scares u,
leave me alone.

i went to the SINGTEL GRID GIRLS audition.
SUCKS big time.

screwed it all up.

there were like dozens of girls there.
and my number was 270.
apparantly, there were OVER 300 applicants.

i know i dont really stand a chance.
but it just seemed fun to me to give it a go.
XD

there were countless pretty girls.
i mean, everyone looks the same,
big eyes, loong fake lashes and all..

we were supposed to speak to the CAMERA.
it was like practically talking to yourself,
what's ur name,
how old are u,
what's ur occupation,
short self intro,
why u should be a grid girl.

and i gave ultra generic answers,
as though there was a marking scheme.
like:
hi, im angela.
im 18.
Currently waiting for uni admission,
just finished my alevels.
im ummm.. cheerful,
and.. .. funloving?
i should be a grid girl cus..
..
..
i have a great smile?
LOL.
WTF. 1000% bimbo/kuku answer.

ZZzzz
haha..

and one of them asked me,
what was my fave sports.

i dunno why.
my brain couldnt work there.
LOL.
immediately, i blurted out:
TRACK. running.
my fave event is the 400m race,
as it makes everything feels more complete.

full stop.
end of statement.

i spoke LESS than 10 sentences in all.

LOL.
damn.

and only about 40plus will get picked..
=\
in which voting takes place for the top 20..

hah. then i went on a eating spree with
SIMLIN.

and we caught the movie star trek.
its FABULOUS.
and we took neoprints.
and we looked at hot guys.
and we laughed alot.
and we had fun.

had dinner with sis and mama..
but i didnt eat much.. =\

no appetite recently.. T_T

..
.
..

i just finished chatting with my bf on the phone.
HAH.
proved myself right.

i knew i shouldnt tell him of all my "lame" pageants,
beauty queen wannabe nonsense.
he always thought all that will label myself as a BIMBO,
a brainless girl with looks and nothing else.

that's because u guys are superficial.

i join pageants, not cus im a beauty queen wannabe.
i just want to feel the satisfaction, from getting into finals.
i want to meet more people out there, widen my horizons.
i find it fun and interesting, why not? since im so free..

and i do NOT think im pretty.
i know there are prettier girls out there.
i just like people saying i am.
i mean, who doesnt like all those?

i dont want praises from friends,
cus their judgement is clouded cus they know me personally.

im just being frank abt it,
not tt im proud or arrogant.
a humble "thank you" for praises is always better than a hypocritical "no la... im not.."

and im doing all these only for fun.
NOTHING ELSE.

i dont think i can and will ever become a professional model.
or a top beauty queen, miss singapore universe,
or singtel grid girl winner what so ever.
i dont do impractical daydreaming. ((:

..
.
..

and MY BF.
have to rub it in.

he simply cannot support me in my choice.

so i've decided.

im NEVER going to tell him about ANY of the pageants i join.
he'd find it out for himself.

i dont like the way he give me the "why the bimbo competition" reply.
i dont like him generalizing every pageants contestants as bimbos.
i dont like how he brings me down and disapprove of my decision.
i dont like it.

.
..
.
.
.
.
.
..
.

i dont mind others judging me with my looks or whatever.
i dont care.
i dont mind others having a wrong impression of me.
i dont bother.

i dont explain.

-think of me as a bimbo. (most of u out there)
just because i have an interest in modelling?
just because i like to look good and get praises?
just beacuse i have my childish and retarded moments?
ask me. i'd say call me a BIM, whatever u like.

-believe im not a virgin. (my JC classmates, EVEN my sister)
just because i have a bf?
just because i dont seem pure and innocent?
i dont know.
many told me dont get urself pregnant, i'd reply..
1. i believe in making love with ONR partner for the entire lifetime. (my husband)
2. even if i do, i'd use a condom.
EVERYONE believes in 2 only, whatever makes them happy.

i enjoy being unglam.
i love being myself.

thats why i dont make up most of the time.

im just tired of being misunderstood.
judge me for all i care.. =.=

i just need my friends to believe in me.
i just need those i love to support me.

why can jasline, yilin, clarissa, simlin, my sister, jalene, alex .. .. .. support me,
but not u?

i have my passion and my wants.
i do what i feel is right.
cus i dont want to look back later,
and wonder WHAT IF i .. .. ..

im young.
i want to capture my beautiful moments.
i want to be recognised.
at least i try to.

at least i can tell people,
i WAS a finalist for XXX competition.

..

u can dont support me,
at least discourage me.
because u matter.

it sucks.

cus when i do something,
im very firm of my decision.
i do not regret and i KNOW what im doing.

LET ME DO WHAT I WANT.

Blogged By The Girl Who Is Easily Contented.

10:47 PM